Update on the Continuing Foster Care Saga

There was a court hearing yesterday which we were hoping would bring clarity as to which direction the case would be going from here on out. Ultimately, the judge ruled that he wants to give the girls' birthmother more time to either prove or disprove if she is a fit parent. So, we will have another hearing at the end of May at which time we should know whether or not things are moving toward termination of birth parent rights or toward reunification with the birth parent.

It seemed evident yesterday that the judge tends to be swayed strongly toward birth parent rights and having them meet minimum requirements in order to get their children back. However, the other professionals on the case seem to agree that the birth mother has had a really bad history with her other children and that she is not really making any real changes that would make her a fit parent for the twins. So, we continue to pray that the truth will be revealed over the course of the next couple of months. There is a very likely possibility that I will be bringing the girls for even more visits with their birth mother because the judge wants to give her more hours with them to see if she has indeed made improvements in her parenting. Visits are always really hard so I will need extra strength and courage to do what is required. Only by God's grace can we travel this difficult road.

No Thief Like Fear

 Some lyrics to a song by Jason Gray have been resonating with me the last couple of days. I leave you with the lyrics below, but first, let me tell you why the words have meant so much to me. Over the past month or so, I have begun to realize that one of the greatest sins in my life is fear. I've always been the worrying type, thinking of the worst case scenario when my thoughts start to get the best of me. However, I've never really been convicted of the sin in this until now. Through a women's Bible study I'm in I've realized my need to learn what it means to fear the Lord and nothing else. My most urgent prayer is to be released from the bondage of fear and worry. It is possible to live in freedom from those sins but I've never really believed that until now. Enjoy the lyrics- they are really powerful!

"No Thief Like Fear"

Fear will take the best of us
Then come back for the rest of us
Its raging hunger never satisfied
It’s closer than a brother
And more jealous than a lover
Who holds you while it swallows you alive
Let down your guard
And it will steal your heart

There’s no thief like fear, no
There’s no thief like fear, no
Oh oh oh oh oh oh

I’ve tried to blame bureaucracy
The weak-knees of hypocrisy
And the cruel and shifting winds of circumstance
But I know insecurity
Is the worst of my own enemies
He sings his lonely song and I will dance
As he robs me blind
Right before my eyes

There’s no thief like fear, no
There’s no thief like fear, no
Oh oh oh oh oh oh

Set me free, set me free
Oh my God set me free
From these chains holding me
Oh my God set me free

There’s no thief like fear, no
There’s no thief like fear, no
There’s no thief like fear, no
There’s no thief like fear, no
Oh oh oh oh oh oh

I am free, I am free
Oh my God has set me free
From these chains I am released
For my God has set me free

I am free, I am free
Oh my God has rescued me
From these chains I am released
For my God has set me free

Update on Life

Things are getting busy around here as we gear up for another summer with Eagle Lake Camp. Shaun is in the midst of hiring the summer staff who will serve as counselors for the kids who come to camp. So far he has filled more than half of the positions and only has 3 more guys to hire. For some reason the girls positions always fill faster...I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that the females ALWAYS turn their applications in 1-2 months before the guys typically do?? This has been a noticeable pattern since we started in 2009!

We are really looking forward to another summer of camp life. It is such a blessing to live in community with the rest of the Eagle Lake staff for those 4 months. The summer is a rich time of spiritual growth and challenge. It will also be fun to have the girls up there with us. They will most likely be walking all over the place by then!

Speaking of the girls, they will turn 1 in exactly one week! It's crazy to think about how much they have changed in the past few months. It was only Christmas that they were not even crawling and now they are moving around and doing everything but walking on their own. They are a joy and a delight and we often lay in bed at night and remark to each other how stinkin' cute our little girlies are!

I am keeping busy at home going through a similar routine each day. I love my time with the twins but trying to maintain a somewhat organized and clean space as well as provide wholesome meals for my family can prove challenging at times. I've found that I don't enjoy cooking as much as I used to because I have to manage fussy girls each afternoon as well as try and get a meal prepared. One of these days it will get easier again. When does that late afternoon fussiness end? Whenever that is, I'm looking forward to it! Lately I have really enjoyed the beautiful Colorado weather with 1-2 walks each day. The girls seem to also enjoy the great outdoors as long as the wind isn't blowing too hard!

We are also happy to report that our visits with the girls' paternal grandmother went really well. We are greatly encouraged and it seems like she is really starting to trust us and is becoming very open to the idea of us keeping the girls rather than trying to raise them herself. Time will tell. We continue to have open communication with her and to send her pictures and videos. Thank you for all your prayers!