First Appointment scheduled

Last week we received an email from Snowflakes telling us that they had received all of the contracts from both the genetic family and from us! That means the genetic family didn't change their mind about letting us adopt their four embryos so everything is official. We have four little babies who are frozen in Michigan waiting for a chance at life. Writing that makes me smile. I am excited for what the next few months are going to bring. When we first began our journey with infertility 4 1/2 years ago it didn't take very many months for me to lose almost all hope of achieving pregnancy. This is the closest I have felt to pregnancy in 4 years and I am enjoying the anticipation and feeling of hopefulness. I pray often that the Lord would allow these babies a chance at life and that we would be blessed with another child in our family.

Last Friday I called the fertility clinic to schedule my initial patient appointment. We will have to travel to Michigan twice. Once for the initial appointment where they will do bloodwork and any other checks/tests needed to establish me as a patient. Then again for the actual frozen embryo transfer (FET). Shaun and I will be flying to Detroit on July 9th for the appointment on the 10th. Then we will fly back right after on a late evening flight. With this now on the calendar it's really sinking in! A close friend asked me in an email how I was feeling and this was my response:

"I'm feeling excited. Things are really falling into place. Sometimes I find myself worrying that they will find something wrong with me that will prevent it from actually happening when they run all the tests that are required but I am trying to rest in the peace of knowing God has it all under control and we felt led down this path. All we can do is take it one step at a time."

Understanding the cost of adoption

Building a family through adoption can be expensive. Although, I believe without a doubt that if God has called a couple to adopt, then He will provide the means necessary to bring their child or children home. When it comes to embryo adoption, we feel very much at peace about spending the money necessary to make this happen, and it also happens to be one of the most affordable adoption choices.

"Isn't embryo adoption going to cost you a whole lot of money? Isn't it basically just as much as doing in vitro?" is a question I've gotten a few times since we've decided to do this. The answer is no, it is actually much more affordable because we are not paying for the steps involved with actually creating the embryos and having them frozen.

Here is a breakdown of adoption costs for the various types of adoption. All this information is taken from our agencies webpage: www.nightlight.org because they handle all forms of adoption: embryo, domestic, international, and foster. I will be sharing some of our personal financial information simply as a means of making it real to those of you who may be considering adoption in one form or another.

Foster adoption is the least expensive form of adoption, but if a couple has their heart set on adopting an infant, it can be an emotional and challenging route to take. We adopted our twins through the foster system but it was never a guarantee that we would be able to keep them until we had loved them for 14 months. The Lord definitely called us to that at the time and gave us the strength to get through those long months. I think in the end the actual adoption costs were about $300.

International adoption is the most expensive choice and depending on the country you are adopting from, and the number of required trips, your total estimated costs for an adoption can range from $25,000 – $43,000

Domestic adoption comes next. In general, the cost of an agency adoption through Nightlight will be approximately $18,000. You will also need to hire an attorney for the finalization of the adoption. In general, depending upon the individual characteristics of your adoption and the cost of obtaining an attorney in your state, your total cost may be approximately $20,000 – $25,000. There are a few states that do not require you to adopt through an adoption agency which would significantly lower the cost of a domestic infant adoption, but Colorado is not one of those states.

Embryo adoption costs can vary greatly depending on if you choose to work with an agency or not. In the eyes of the law, embryo adoption doesn't really exist because embryos are considered property, not persons, but there are certain agencies who view embryos as life and therefore go through the same steps for an embryo adoption as is required legally for a domestic adoption. There are also websites you can find to be matched with a genetic couple, making it unnecessary to work with an adoption agency, but you would then need to hire your own attorney to manage the legal side of things. Shaun and I chose to work with an agency because we feel more comfortable with them dealing with the legal aspects. And, this way we know that the genetic family can be at ease about who we are due to the fact that we were required to have an adoption home study done. The extra cost was worth it in our minds.

Here is a breakdown of the cost of embryo adoption:

Snowflakes Program fee: $8,000, Home study agency fee: $1,000-3,000

Fertility clinic frozen embryo transfer fees: $3,000-5,000

TOTAL FEES: $12,000-16,000

We were able to forgo the cost of the home study since ours was completed through our foster care agency. And, we are travelling to the embryos in Michigan to do the frozen embryo transfer, which cuts $2000 off the program fee, so our total expenses will be right around $10,000 if the first transfer results in pregnancy. We are praying it does!